I'm walking from house to house leaving a hint of cat pee everywhere I go but I'm still smiling because I'm making money walking around on a really nice day. 300 flyers? This is cake.
After about 10 houses I start making my way downhill. Oh sheesh, put a roller-coaster track on here and we've got a hill steep enough to propel the car around loops and dips, fast enough to cause G forces that rival a shuttle launch. The ad didn't say to bring a diaper.
Then I start playing this little game with myself: point out everything I would change about the house I'm at. I entertain the idea of starting a business repainting front doors then I start making my way back up the hill. I'm thinking the whole time that the whole route can't be this steep. It took me almost two hours two do a small section on the map and Boss said it was going to take three hours to finish the whole thing.
My friend Chris calls and starts telling me about the trouble he had getting from DC to Little Rock on standby. Small my potatoes, my friend. Then he's asking me when I'm coming over which makes me want to quit immediately but I put my head down and keep moving.
I'm walking down a huge hill with no houses when the Lady in Charge calls to check on me.
LiC: What's up girl? How's it going?
Me: Walking down this hill, I'm not sure if I'm following the map correctly.
LiC: Where you at?
Me: Uhh
LiC: Alright I'm coming to check on you.
She shows up smoking a Newport in the Crown Vic and checks out my map, the ink has started to bleed because I'm sweating.
LiC: Girl I don't know why he has you coming down this big hill, get in.
So I get in, she's nice enough. We drive down the mountain just to turn around and take a right so I'm back on track. I get dropped off and quickly realize that this part of Vector 6 isn't going to be any easier. It would have taken less time if I didn't feel so bad about cutting through the carefully manicured yards. Maybe I should go into landscaping, these people are spending a ton of money on their yards.
My outfit was completely inappropriate for the weather even with my sleeves and pants rolled up. The backpack had already stained my white shirt brown when I got a call from LiC.
LiC: What up girl, you almost done?
I had just finished handing out 100/300 and I feel safe to admit that I was already doubling up at some houses.
Me: Ummm, nope, are people done already?
LiC: Well the Cowboy done quit on me, Josh has been done, I can't get in touch with the Diva, and I don't know what's going on with those other folks.
Me: I've thought about quitting but I don't want to leave you guys hanging. How is he already done?!?
LiC: Man they got my homegirl Megan out here climbing mountains, all of their houses were right next to each other.
Me: haha Of course, well I'm going to keep going.
I work a little longer and call the roommate...this just makes me want to go home. Whomp, whomp. I hang up and go back to it.
My sister calls to check on me; I'm glad that somebody knew where I was because I was certainly the closest I've ever been to passing out from heat exhaustion. She met me with a huge cup of ice water and took me to the store to get a couple of drinks I can keep in my pee pee bag. She helped me with a bunch of houses and completely boosted my morale. She went on her way, promising not to leave me in the "bowels of West Little Rock" forever.
I'm soon confronted with the biggest hill yet. Awesome. The mailman has already passed me a few times on my route but our paths cross when I'm moving at a pace that could maybe rival a sloth.
Mailman: Need a push?
This just sends me into a fit of giggles, yes I needed a push...it would have been awesome if he had offered me a ride. Whatever. We start to discuss how hard that route is and I find out that USPS would never make their postmen walk such a route and he told me to start cutting through the beautiful lawns.
I took his advice but I was already so beat that I was relieved when the Lady in Charge called to tell me it was time to quit. I handed out 264 flyers. I didn't go to 264 houses but I walked past at least that many.
My sister came to get me and took me back to the Best Buy parking lot to collect my day's wages. He felt so bad for me that he gave me $40 instead of $26. I've never worked so hard for money but as my sister said, "You got paid and now you know that this is something you don't want to do for the rest of your life."
Boss offered me an interview for Full-time ad sales with his company...I'm meeting with him on Tuesday. Also, my face got sunburned so I don't have to worry about make-up for at least a week. (RAWR) My chest sunburn kills but it gives me something to complain about.
No comments:
Post a Comment