Carol told me I had to fill out an application and my eyes immediately found the "bartender" section of interest. I signed up for everything that pertained to the bar.
When I left, I called my friend Chris to tell him about my badass volunteer gig I got bartending and he immediately applied.
We showed up for our first event dressed in black pants and white shirts as Carol had requested. Then we went to find her to see what our bartending jobs would require.
She put Chris at the bar, serving drinks and laughing with the members all night. Then she decided she wouldn't need anymore bartenders so...I had to be security.
By security I mean, not letting people into the galleries with food or drinks. I hated it.
I watched Chris all night having a grand time laughing and mingling with Little Rock's finest. I stood watch over the gallery, getting angrier by the minute.
Chris came over to bring me a gin and tonic (just a splash of tonic), that made my security job better. Then he brought me another. Before I knew it, I was in love with my new job.
Now I beg to be security. I choose this job because I get to drink and I don't have to actually do anything.
Usually people notice the signs that say "NO FOOD OR DRINKS IN THE GALLERY," so my job is especially pointless. I've only had two incidents of people not minding the sign, so I have to step in and take care of business. Mind you, I go to these events at least twice a month and I've been doing it for a while.
The first time was at the Delta Exhibition, a huge show with about 200 artist selected from the Southern Delta to display their work.
A man tried to walk in with his cup of white wine and I immediately stopped him. Turns out, he was one of the major artists invited. Then I had to have a conversation with him about how I don't really have the authority to stop him from going to see his own work. He was very gracious, he even said that he was glad I wasn't letting people in with drinks and we had a conversation about what it takes to be invited into this group of really talented artists.
Actually, the second time was also at the Delta Exhibition. (I guess we could call them an "unruly bunch") People were dressed up for this...like may-jah dressed up. One woman had a ceramic necklace on that represents a sunburst. It reminded me of the sun we all draw as children except it was around her neck, the rays radiating from her neck instead of an orange circle. I just know she paid wayyy to much for it. Actually, that's what I thought about everybody's clothes night.
Alright, there were a couple exceptions. One lady that looked like a 50 something hooker that shops at the Rave. The other was wearing a Hanes maroon sweatsuit, I feel like her name would be Maureen. (No offense if any of you have that name.)
She started towards the gallery door dragging her shopping bag on wheels, it looked something like this:
Her bag didn't distract my keen eye from seeing the bottle of water tucked under her arms.
Note: Drinks are free and unlimited
I said "Oh, ma'am, you aren't allowed to take that into the gallery."
She immediately stops and says, "I"M A DIABETIC!!! What if I go into diabetic shock while I'm in the gallery, how are you going to feel about that?!?"
I felt everybody turn and stare. My face got hot and I panicked. I didn't want to disappoint Carol but I really wasn't there to get yelled at so I compromised. "All right ma'am, you just make sure you leave that cap on," I said as sternly as I could.
Then she huffed and turned away. I could have pointed out that there is no way water would help her if she went into diabetic shock but Maureen was like a wild animal, I had no way to predict her reaction. I suspect that if we had checked her bag, she had squirreled away as many water bottles she could get her hands on.
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